Post by Old Dragon (Al) on Dec 9, 2004 4:17:18 GMT 1
Part 40.
Divine, darling!
How absolutely fabulous to hear from you - and after all this time. too! Why, I do believe the last time I saw you must have been not long before my daughter Alice was born and that's nearly fifteen years ago. So much has happened since then, we'll clearly have a lot of catching up to do!
I'm slowly trying to get to grips with this internet thing. Everyone keeps going on about it and how good it is, but I tell you, Divine, it is as much as I can do to figure out how to make the rat point in the right direction. I always did get my lefts and rights mixed up, but my lodger is doing his best to help... Oh, that reminds me, did you know that Simeon and I split up and divorced? It's years ago now. In fact, he's currently somewhere on one of your Scottish Islands with his hippy trollop of a wife, a great brood of children and our daughter, too. I'm convinced Alice will come to her senses soon and return home, but meanwhile I'm determined to live life to the full without the responsibility of caring for her. Indeed, it wouldn't surprise me to find she's jealous of the attention I'm giving my delightful young lodger in her absence, but that's another story.
Yes, I've taken up painting with a vengeance and have surprised myself with the success of my first exhibition. Just as you were - and clearly still are - up for a bit of fun, I admit that was my intention when I first set out to paint a few male nudes. Well, with men not being the flavour of the month at that time, I thought I'd strike a blow for women's lib. Little did I realise then that easily 50% of the paintings sold to date would be to the gay community! Darling, they appear to love me almost as much as my work, and the commissions (and party invitations) are pouring in! One, extremely flamboyant fellow who was invited along to the exhibition's opening night by the gallery owners, turns out to be a fashion designer and has totally taken me under his wing, insisting on designing a whole new wardrobe for me, and is adamant that my new found status requires a whole new and modern image! I haven't had so much fun in years, let alone the attention! Alas, my reputation will never be the same again. I had no idea just how stuffy and conventional I'd become. It's as if I've been vegetating and life's suddenly woken me up.
How strange that you should be running an animal centre. Why, only today I received a most impressive invitation to be a guest of honour at a presentation dinner and to present some cheques to various animal rescue centres locally and on behalf of the roving wildlife artist & photographer, Albert Ross. I'm so flattered that he should ask me, but at a loss to know why he's singled out Cuckooland for his donations? Unless, of course, it has something to do with the local council's plans to develop a local beauty-spot, Haven Meadows. At last a campaign to try and preserve that area seems to be finally getting underway, although it has to be said, not before a couple of local scandals resulted in highlighting the situation in the national press. First there was the arrest of a local woman, Amelia Hedgehunter, who was discovered dancing there naked and reputedly out of her mind on some sort of chemical substance. (She's since been committed to the local psychiatric hospital and believes herself to be a reincarnation of an ancestor burned at the stake in the 16th century for practicing witchcraft.) The second incident occurred when a local science teacher (from the school that Alice used to attend) apparently exposed himself to members of the W.I. as they were enjoying their annual seed gathering walk! Rumour has it that he's claiming it all a misunderstanding, and that he was simply taken short after eating some chocolate muffins that he confiscated off one of the school children. The poor man swears they were made with laxative chocolate, but his story is so far fetched nobody believes him, least of all the members of the W.I. How I laughed at the thought of those ladies being confronted by a man in an old raincoat and with his trousers around his ankles as they gathered their nuts and berries! Indeed, I overheard one describing his attributes as little more than a 'pawn shop'! However, in this instance it appears size doesn't matter at all, it was up before the magistrate and straight onto the sex offender's register, first offence or not.
Anyway, I just loved your tale of the 'otter'! Whatever did they say when they discovered the truth? It is so like you to wind them up like that. Why, they sound as bad as the locals around here! Only this evening I was telling young Nick (my 17 years old lodger, and a charming lad) that we should give the gossips plenty to talk about, as they clearly need to get a life. The poor boy even has the vicar's wife trying to tell him what to do! (Yes, another one of your wretched 'playing God' characters!) The wretched woman even told him to move back in with his family! She has no idea what his family are like, either. Why, his father spends most of his time in the pub and his mother's no different and their children have been in and out of care most of their lives. I was quite shocked when I realised who Nick's family are, but at least he seems to be determined to break the cycle and wants nothing to do with any of them, they way they behave. You'd never believe it, but his father once ran a very successful local business and his mother had a hairdressing salon some years ago. Years ago they were local ballroom dancing champions too. Goodness knows what happened, but within a couple of years of their marriage both businesses went bankrupt.
But enough of them. Do tell me all about what you've been doing all these years? It is so exciting hearing from you again, I can hardly wait to hear from you again.
Until then, take care,
Cecelia
******************************************************
(Continued in Part 41.)
Divine, darling!
How absolutely fabulous to hear from you - and after all this time. too! Why, I do believe the last time I saw you must have been not long before my daughter Alice was born and that's nearly fifteen years ago. So much has happened since then, we'll clearly have a lot of catching up to do!
I'm slowly trying to get to grips with this internet thing. Everyone keeps going on about it and how good it is, but I tell you, Divine, it is as much as I can do to figure out how to make the rat point in the right direction. I always did get my lefts and rights mixed up, but my lodger is doing his best to help... Oh, that reminds me, did you know that Simeon and I split up and divorced? It's years ago now. In fact, he's currently somewhere on one of your Scottish Islands with his hippy trollop of a wife, a great brood of children and our daughter, too. I'm convinced Alice will come to her senses soon and return home, but meanwhile I'm determined to live life to the full without the responsibility of caring for her. Indeed, it wouldn't surprise me to find she's jealous of the attention I'm giving my delightful young lodger in her absence, but that's another story.
Yes, I've taken up painting with a vengeance and have surprised myself with the success of my first exhibition. Just as you were - and clearly still are - up for a bit of fun, I admit that was my intention when I first set out to paint a few male nudes. Well, with men not being the flavour of the month at that time, I thought I'd strike a blow for women's lib. Little did I realise then that easily 50% of the paintings sold to date would be to the gay community! Darling, they appear to love me almost as much as my work, and the commissions (and party invitations) are pouring in! One, extremely flamboyant fellow who was invited along to the exhibition's opening night by the gallery owners, turns out to be a fashion designer and has totally taken me under his wing, insisting on designing a whole new wardrobe for me, and is adamant that my new found status requires a whole new and modern image! I haven't had so much fun in years, let alone the attention! Alas, my reputation will never be the same again. I had no idea just how stuffy and conventional I'd become. It's as if I've been vegetating and life's suddenly woken me up.
How strange that you should be running an animal centre. Why, only today I received a most impressive invitation to be a guest of honour at a presentation dinner and to present some cheques to various animal rescue centres locally and on behalf of the roving wildlife artist & photographer, Albert Ross. I'm so flattered that he should ask me, but at a loss to know why he's singled out Cuckooland for his donations? Unless, of course, it has something to do with the local council's plans to develop a local beauty-spot, Haven Meadows. At last a campaign to try and preserve that area seems to be finally getting underway, although it has to be said, not before a couple of local scandals resulted in highlighting the situation in the national press. First there was the arrest of a local woman, Amelia Hedgehunter, who was discovered dancing there naked and reputedly out of her mind on some sort of chemical substance. (She's since been committed to the local psychiatric hospital and believes herself to be a reincarnation of an ancestor burned at the stake in the 16th century for practicing witchcraft.) The second incident occurred when a local science teacher (from the school that Alice used to attend) apparently exposed himself to members of the W.I. as they were enjoying their annual seed gathering walk! Rumour has it that he's claiming it all a misunderstanding, and that he was simply taken short after eating some chocolate muffins that he confiscated off one of the school children. The poor man swears they were made with laxative chocolate, but his story is so far fetched nobody believes him, least of all the members of the W.I. How I laughed at the thought of those ladies being confronted by a man in an old raincoat and with his trousers around his ankles as they gathered their nuts and berries! Indeed, I overheard one describing his attributes as little more than a 'pawn shop'! However, in this instance it appears size doesn't matter at all, it was up before the magistrate and straight onto the sex offender's register, first offence or not.
Anyway, I just loved your tale of the 'otter'! Whatever did they say when they discovered the truth? It is so like you to wind them up like that. Why, they sound as bad as the locals around here! Only this evening I was telling young Nick (my 17 years old lodger, and a charming lad) that we should give the gossips plenty to talk about, as they clearly need to get a life. The poor boy even has the vicar's wife trying to tell him what to do! (Yes, another one of your wretched 'playing God' characters!) The wretched woman even told him to move back in with his family! She has no idea what his family are like, either. Why, his father spends most of his time in the pub and his mother's no different and their children have been in and out of care most of their lives. I was quite shocked when I realised who Nick's family are, but at least he seems to be determined to break the cycle and wants nothing to do with any of them, they way they behave. You'd never believe it, but his father once ran a very successful local business and his mother had a hairdressing salon some years ago. Years ago they were local ballroom dancing champions too. Goodness knows what happened, but within a couple of years of their marriage both businesses went bankrupt.
But enough of them. Do tell me all about what you've been doing all these years? It is so exciting hearing from you again, I can hardly wait to hear from you again.
Until then, take care,
Cecelia
******************************************************
(Continued in Part 41.)